People come into our lives and we never realize how much
they are going to touch us. Riggie was
one of those that touched my life in such a way that all I can hope is that I
turn out to be just as amazing as she was.
Earlier today we got the call from her son that she had passed
away. She was 94 years young but had
given up the fight and was now in a much better place.
Riggie was my mentor, aunt and confidant. I met her 28 years ago and fell in love with
her instantly. She was the type of
person that I can only hope to someday be like.
I remember when we first met. My
husband’s father had passed away and we went to Hawaii for his memorial
service. One night I come walking out to
the patio and Riggie, my husband’s step mom and his cousin’s girlfriend are
sitting on one side of the table and there is only one chair on the other side
of the table. My first thought was “what
is going on and am I on trial for something”.
As I nervously sat down Riggie asked if I wanted a drink, of course I
wanted a drink I didn’t know what was going on.
I had my drink in hand and Riggie began to say to me “as the head of the
household I want you to know that we have been discussing you”, I thought “ok
so at least you have the nerve to tell me that you have been talking about me”. She then proceeded to tell me that they all
liked me and had accepted me into the family; you could imagine my relief since
we were already married and had been for a few years. This encounter was a turning point for my
relationship with Riggie.
During this trip I remember how excited Riggie was to teach
me how to drink wine, of course it was from a box because she was absolutely amazed
that they could get good wine in a box.
She also introduced me to some of the finer things about Hawaii. She
showed me that it’s ok to have a vise as long as it doesn’t interfere with your
life, she love to have one cigarette after dinner. She would sit back and enjoy every single
moment of smoking it. Of course my vise
is not smoking but enjoying good glass of wine and no I no longer dink wine
from a box but do think of those days fondly.
She also taught me that it was a man’s responsibility to clean the
silver, help in the kitchen, clean house and help with the kids. She was for equal rights, no matter what.
A few years later Riggie and her husband, Larry, moved to
the mainland. They found a nice
apartment in a senior complex. They had
the apartment designed to fit their needs.
Riggie was about a foot taller than I am. I remember our first visit to their new
apartment and how excited she was to show me how great this place was because
it fit her height. I remember standing
at the kitchen counter and thinking how much I felt like a child because it was
almost at eye level. I then went into
the restroom where I had to almost jump to sit down on the toilet and washing
my hands was not as easy as it should have been because I could barely reach
the sink. I kept looking around for a footstool.
As tall as Riggie her heart was just as big. When I decided to go back to college she
encouraged me to. Whenever I was getting
discouraged about raising children, going to school and working a letter from
her would show up. I cherished those
letters and her encouragement. I’m not
sure if I would have continued if not for her.
After I graduated with honors she was so proud of me and told me this
often.
While we didn’t live close to each other and didn’t speak to
each other often she was still such an important person in my life that there will
be a large hole. Riggie, rest in peace.
